Grapevine Communication

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Grapevine communication - What is it and why should we avoid it ?

This was the topic discussed yesterday during one of the sessions of Spiritual Awakening in our office. One of the lady with very impressive credentials in psychology demonstrated a very powerful value based activity to help us ingest some of the beautiful lessons of life.

Let me first share the activity.

She called the 5 volunteers and then asked 4 of them to go out of the room. 

Now, she explained a scenario and asked the volunteer to enact that scenario. The scenario was that you went to supermarket, take the trolley and then you purchase the 1^st item on your way, rejecting 2^nd item and then again selecting 3^rd item and at the end do a payment and came out. 

After explaining the scenario, she called the one of the volunteer from outside and told him to observe and then repeat the same actions of the volunteer. After this situation was put into action by 1st volunteer, she called the third volunteer from out and asked him to observe and then repeat the action of the 2^nd volunteer. This activity continued till the performance of last volunteer.

And then she asked the volunteers in the reverse fashion that what they think they were doing. The message was distorted completely. May be by now, you have understood the significance of the activity. If not, stay tuned. Last volunteer told us that he thought he was putting the garland around some big personalities and at the end, put the remaining garlands in basket. Second last volunteer told us that he thought he was collecting books from different shelves and then putting it in a school bag. Another one thought he was in a book store. The next one told us the right answer that he is in a supermarket and doing shopping but added so much masala/material by himself. He purchased too many items and thus did not follow his predecessor properly. By the time, massage crosses 3, 4 ears, it had completely lost its meaning. 

Do you know why?

Perception.

 Yes, every one of us perceives the given situations as per his fears; mentality and they needn’t to be necessarily true. Thus, we cannot always believe on our eyes and also the information from the second hand source because that source perceives it as per his mentality which may not be true. 

In terms of management and corporate, grapevine is a term for this type of communication. We must avoid such communications/gossips not only for saving ourselves from landing in trouble but also in order to build trust and reputation.

A Wonderful Message by George Carlin

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider Freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness. 

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. 

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things. 

We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less. 

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete. 

Remember to spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.

Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side. 

Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.

Remember, to say, 'I love you' to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you. 

Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.

Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.

And always remember, life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by those moments that take our breath away.

Advice/Appeal to 2 wheelers riders

Every day while going to office, I see a lot of people commuting to office on 2 wheelers with their lunch box hanging on the handle. It is my sincere request to them that please avoid holding anything on the handle as it is a huge threat and can cause some really serious accident. 

6 months back, I was also doing the same and while turning my bike, TVS Apache RTR 160cc,  lunch box got stuck in between the handle and the Bike front area (Don’t know what it is called but I think one can imagine it easily) and as a result of which, I fell down with my right elbow directly hitting the ground. It was so serious that I had undergone a surgery with 4 screws inserted in my right elbow. I am facing the problem till date as I am not able to straighten my hand in spite of regular and vigorous physiotherapy sessions that I am taking from last 5 months. 

Whenever I see someone doing like this, I am not able to control myself but to approach the person and let him know the associated risk in driving like this and in return, another person thanks me but I often think that the other person is not taking it seriously. Let it be, my job is to make them aware.

The Healing power of Surgery - 2

This post is in continuation to my last post. Please find below the link for the same: http://atlasshrugged-eccentric.blogspot.in/2013/04/the-healing-powe-rof-surgery-1.html

     4. It also increased my love for my family and relatives many folds. There was a lot of things to do just before the marriage like card distribution, sweets order, so many bookings and what not in any typical Indian marriage. Since I cannot help, he alone has to do it. He was so busy and stressed in those days. Also, my cousins Saransh and Ayush also did a lot of work. All this told me the importance and value of relatives. You cannot walk alone, you always need people to share your joys and sorrows. Everybody helped me to deal with it but it is my wife who knows it all after marriage. She knew sometimes I felt so low due to it. Her emotional support was tremendous and perhaps greater than any other power.  http://atlasshrugged-eccentric.blogspot.in/2013/01/for-my-loving-wife.html

5.   It taught me the self-discipline and patience which are the 2 most important attributes to be happy according to me. I had to follow a strict regime everyday comprising of physiotherapy session; exercise 2-3 times at home as told by the doctor, ice pack, medicines on time, healthy diet, fruits. I also realized no matter how hard you try, healing will not be expedited beyond a particular limit. Being patient was the only option. I would like to reiterate my favorite quote which I have already used many times in my blog: Nature never hurries yet everything is accomplished. I adopted the pace of the nature, her secret is patience.

      6. Whenever I think of my surgery, my share of Bad Karmas (deeds) came in front of my eyes. I was able to recall the moments of my life whenever I lied, criticize somebody without any reason and did something which was not right and against my soul. As a result of all this, I forgive everybody in my heart with whom I had issues at some point of my life and released my emotions. I thought life is much bigger than carrying all these small little things of no value in heart. This thing does not matter much. I become much more fully alive than ever before. Somebody has rightly said that Death can teach you about life.

   7.   It accelerated my journey towards my spiritual growth. I had a lot of time at my disposal which allowed me to listen to my inner self. I started reading the Speaking tree section that comes in TOI (Times of India) every day and started loving it. Later, I searched some books on spirituality and found them very interesting and helping too. I also get introduced to Mediation, mindful techniques which however I did not practice.

8.  I once read it somewhere that this world is a very friendly place to live and the universe is conspiring for all of us to do better in our life. It is very deep wisdom. At the time of my marriage, I used to thoughts that the timing of my injury is very wrong, 10 days before my marriage, it will kill the fun element in the marriage and also my marriage photographs will not be that good as I will be captured along with the plaster cast and it reminds me about the injury every time I will look at the photographs. But now, I thought 10 days before the marriage was the best time that the injury can happen. At this point, I successfully unleashed the hidden reasons behind it. If it would after the marriage, somebody got a chance to say that my marriage brings me bad luck or something like that. And if it would happen a long time before my marriage then who would have taken care of me in Hyderabad as my family is in Saharanpur, U.P. and I work in Hyderabad.

Who would have taken me to physiotherapy session every day, who would help me to follow the discipline, who would have drop me to my office every day and who would have given me the emotional support. Thanks to my wife.