Type of people one encounter generally in the typical local bar

Distinct species of human being found in Bar

I am not talking about those expensive bars like hardrock café, café Morrison or where the menu is itself a book. Instead, I am referring to small local places which people with higher frequency visits. Their frequency and capacity made it difficult for them to afford such exorbitant places located in the heart of the city. Such people like the places where they can enjoy the alcohol without worrying too much about the money. Crowd does not matter for them. What if girls don’t visit such places? What if the waiter brings your order 10 minutes late. What is a big deal in that. What if toilets are not that clean. You will get the value for the money and end up in saving your too little bank balance. 

Let me describe some of the most interesting people you find often in the bar.

1. Frustu: Such people are found in abundance. They are good people and blessed with

   

   Frustu/ Glutton - Anil

   amazing sense of humor. Generally, their desperation towards some things irrespective of living or non living  make them frustu. They crack jokes on them, waiter and everywhere present. They find it hard to say NO to the people and knowingly fall into traps. They are renamed as ‘Liquid’ in this modern day after inspiring from the movie ‘Pyar ka Panchnama.’ You are also one of them or happened to be once in your life if you are reading this post.
2. Friendly and distracted: These people always look at the other tables, order of other people. When you see them, they respond you with a smile. They will even offer you a cigarette. Such people generally find someone like them and begun to discuss things that mattered to none. They go on taking the phone no. of each other and promised to drink sometime together but next morning, they laugh on their stupidity and none of the party contacts the other one.
3. Lovers:

   

   Experienced/Philosopher - Chandan

   Such people generally plays the music at their cell. They prefer silence and generally watched the TV at mute. They also share beautiful and sad Shera shayari few pegs down the line.
4. Philosophers:They generally talks about the benefit of drinking. They kept on talking and talking and drinking and drinking. They quote second hand quotations and some third class haikus. They enjoy the alcohol to the fullest and pretend that they are they the most happiest persons on the earth. 
5. Boasters:  Most of the time, such people drink much more than they can digest and ended up indigestion. They are the one who always say things like “yaar, bike mein chalaunga.” They repeat their achievements every time they drank. They are quite redundant in their approach. They always try to make sure that no one drink more than them on the table.
   
6.  Experienced: They drink passionately and patiently  enjoying every sip. They make sure about the 3 ‘D’ formula so that the bad effect of alcohol is minimized on their liver. 3 D refers to Delay, Dilute, Diet. This formula is self explanatory. They frequency is quite often but they never drink like a fish.
7. Beginners:

   

   Beginner

   They are very skeptical about such places. They stresses on the service and cleanliness of the place. They shoot queries regarding happy hours and all and told by the waiters that there is no such thing here.  They asked the waiters for the recommendations before ordering the food and the waiters (generally of such places) shoots the arrows in the air without knowing anything. Such people, in the beginning, try to speak in English but seeing the response from the other side, came back to their home language.
8. Glutted one: They generally prefers the food more as compared to drink. With such people, you have to order a lot of snacks as they didn’t leave any dish to last longer and in tune with alcohol by their art of over eating. They are sometimes like pain in the ass for those who experienced and professional drinkers.
9. Submissive people:

   

   Submissive - Sanjeev

   They never touch the menu and survive on the same things ordered by their friends. They generally have no particular taste and love everything. Sometimes, this quality disappoint  you and sometimes, you don’t have any problem depending upon your mood.
10.  All rounder: They play all the above roles and many other left unleashed depending on the company, mood and lot of other factors.

    

    Unpredictable

Life tight hai tension nahi hai.....

‘TIGHT’. This word holds a special significance in the life of IET students. IET Lucknow, where most of the students are from Uttar Pradesh, is one of the best college in the Uttar Pradesh and has its own copyrighted language inspired from Kanpur and lucknow. 

The usage of this word is not less than the word Fuck and similarly, it is used everywhere.

1. After the exams, if you asked somebody, how was the paper?Most often, the reply is ‘Tight tha’ which means exam was tough and if the reply is ‘Tight hua’ then it means you have escape from the pressures of Back paper which are very mild although I had never experienced this situation due to the generosity of my friends and teachers.
2. ‘Tight hoo,’ that means I am heavily drunk right now. ‘Tight hai kya,’ another way of asking if you are drunk.
3. After ragging, seniors people instructed juniors to remain tight. That means ‘tension free and bindaas.’
4. In a mess on Wednesday, everybody says, ‘Tight bana tha ’ which means food was simply awesome.
5. If you ask anybody for a money which is very often, the reply of the person is like ’yar, mamla  tight chal raha hai’ which means your source is also facing the bankruptcy these days.
6. In any other context, this word simply means 5/5.

Every IETian was in love with this word. We had used this word everyday and in every situation except 1, we never said any girl, ‘tight lag rahi hai.’ For girls, we never get bored of words like ‘maal’ which is like the universal word followed everywhere and ‘tota’ which is not so common. I don’t like this word ‘tota’ personally and had never used this word and never will however, IETians were in love with it also. 

BHOKALI was one such word that is also used very often.

1. ‘Bhokali lag raha hai’ means you are looking like hunk.
2. ‘Bhokali ban raha hai’ means you are trying to be hunk or too much involved in all the activities of college like politicians and showing  neta-panti, neta-giri.
3. ‘Bhokal macha rakha hai, Bhokal tight kar rakha hai,Bhokal kat rakha hai aajkal’ means you have created mayhem in the college, you are enjoying the life fully without caring anything, no classes, all rules are taken for granted and you are too much in neta-giri/neta-panti

Another word coming to my mind is ‘Londe’ that simply means dude. This word was also common and actually the motivation for writing this post comes due to this word. Today, at wall of one of IET friend, I saw all the IETians wishing him the birthday like Happy Birthday Londe, janamdin Mubarak londe. There was something common among all the IEtians. 

‘Chull’  was another word which I guess came from Kanpur. This word was also very common during our times and there were 3 people from Kanpur(Kanpuriyas) who were nick named as Chull brothers. 

Anni, Tang ja, seema, choosega,Taapna are some other quick words which were always on everybody’s lips. 

Our First Love, IET

 Please note that title is inspired from the movie, Pyar Ka panchnama.

Awesome: Awful or Awesome

Nandini had just came back from the movie with her friends. I came to know this from her recently uploaded status on Facebook. I commented asking about the reviews of the movie. She replied, ‘Awesome.’

On facebook, I asked one of the my friend about the experiencing of watching the live cricket match. He just replied,’ Awesomely awesome.’

I was just browsing through the pictures of one of my friends on facebook. Hardly there was any snap in which the word ‘Awesome’ had not appeared in the comments whether it is a picture of  rain, pizza, soccer match, her favorite actor, her favorite restaurant, her new saree, her new hair style, her office, her new  car, her room. After having a look at around some 100 plus photographs of her, I started becoming irritated and went out for a smoke. I met one of the friend, who was returning from the Sports bar, Strokes. I heard a lot about this bar but never happened to be there. I asked him about it. He replied in 1 word, ‘Awesome.’

I thought Awesome is really a magical world that can be used in every situation, everywhere but at the same time, my hate for this word also grew.

Sometimes, I thought, why this word ‘Awesome’ is so popular in the present era. What made this world so popular.? 

This was one of the useless question asked by the always wandering mind.

Few days back, I uploaded the status in Facebook, how everything from pizza to icecream to next to impossible catch to  superb goal in soccer can be 'Awesome'? Comments came like this, ‘Awesome is simply Awesome’ confusing the already confused mind.

Wherever I go, whatever I look, I always hear the word ‘Awesome’. I realized that I can never escape the travesty of this word but I was so fed up of this word that I decided to delete this word from my dictionary. It is simply not my word.

Grass is always greener on the other side

We always crave for what the other people had and never appreciate what we had. As a result, when we began to lose our prized possessions, only then we start appreciating all those.

How many times it happen we never appreciate the people/things when they are with us but started missing them when they are not. A lot.

With this, I remember the one of the common problem i.e. Benching in IT industry. Benching is doing nothing and still enjoying the salary. Those people who are not allocated in any of the current project due to requirement issue, are said to be on the bench.  People who are on the bench always think that they are wasting their time and their experience is increasing without adding value to them. I am not saying they are wrong. On the other hand, people, who are allocated in the project always crave for benching. Both the states have their own pros and cons. It is a well established truth that the person having the Santro longs for Fabia, one having Fabia craves for Octavia, one with Octavia for BMW and so on.

Scene 1: 1.40 pm. Robin was on the bench from last 4 months where as Ashish was in a project but still not contributing much. Ashish just had his lunch while Robin is coming from the home. They meet at the entrance.

Ashish: Hi Robin! How is life going on?

Robin: I am fine. What about you?

Robin tried to ignore Ashish but not able to. Robin was not feeling good as he was still unallocated.

Ashish: I am so busy these days. I am coming early in the morning and also stay late. Also, I have to come on weekends to complete it sometime. Did you get the project?

Ashish tried to show off how busy he is and not like parasite like Robin doing nothing.

Robin: Not yet. Actually I had got a call yesterday. May be I’ll get this time.

Robin pretends because he is ashamed of benching.

Ashish: You are so lucky man to be on the bench. I am not getting time for anything and you are enjoying to the fullest.

Ashish said this intentionally to hurt the Robin.

Robin: No yaar, I am fed up of benching. My experience is increasing but value is not.

Ashish: Don’t worry dude. You will directly go to onsite.

Ashish trying to be sarcastic and over smart.

Robin: I am not thinking of that. I just want the project. Is there any requirement in your project?

Ashish:  Oh shit! I am not on my desk from last 10 minutes. My boss is very strict. We will meet sometime later and talk about it.

Again show off.

Robin contemplating about the thought that everything that happened happened for a reason

Scene 2: : After 4 months, robin got the project. However, Ashish was released from his project and was now on the Bench. Robin just had his lunch with his team and going out for a fag. Ashish just enters in the building.

Robin: Hi dude! What’s up?

Ashish: Nothing much. I am just bored on Benching. I have nothing to do.

Robin: What are you saying man? There are so many movies released last week. Why don’t you go and watch them?

Ashish: Movies no longer interests me.  

Robin: Just enjoy the bench time. This is the golden period of your life. Enjoy your beautiful honeymoon before it come to an end.

Robin remember his days when he had time to chase his passions. He really started appreciating bench time after his bench is over.

Ashish: I don’t feel like so. I think I am wasting my time. Benching is one of the worst thing on this planet.

Ashish realized benching is not that beautiful against his perception about it when he was allocated.

Robin: C’mon yaar. Enjoy it. I also thought like this but after getting this project, I long for the benching time. There are hell lot of things like that I miss after allocation. Swimming, reading, blogging all comes to halt.

Ashish: BTW, you get a good project.

Robin: No, it’s not that good as much it is perceived here.

Ashish: Is there any requirement in your project?

Robin: I would suggest you to look for the better project. You deserved a better project.

Robin said sarcastically.

Ashish: I want the project very badly. I think for some time, any project will do.

Ashish said very desperately.

Robin: I will let you know about requirement. Excuse me for now. I have some pending work.

Robin said ostentatiously.

Robin contemplating on his desk about right and wrongs of life

Why Happy Birthday, not HB?

I thought of putting this as my status in Facebook but Everyday there is a birthday of one or more of my friends which resisted me from putting this post. Wishing a birthday had became a tiring job when your friends list is huge.

I thought that everything has a short form in this virtual world. So, Why not , happy birthday? Can’t we use HB in place of happy birthday or MMHRD(many many happy returns of the day). I, once tried this approach but the reply was quite sarcastic. This approach didn’t work. Sometimes, Writing 2 simple words is so monotonous that it actually became difficult. 

I also discovered something related to this.

People who wish the person early in the day are usually the one who are active in their day to day activities and believe on getting the work done as early as possible wherever those people who, despite being online all the time,  wish the person just before few moments are left for the end of the day are suffering from the procrastination trauma.

Hope, some software engineer would soon develop  a software using which the birthday message will be sent automatically. 

PS- Don't share it on Facebook. It can effect your relations negatively. 

Reading or Watching

Courtesy: Google Images

Vulgar T-shirt quotes                     
YESTERDAY, I visited a R city mall in Mumbai. I just went there to have Zinger meal of KFC which I like very much.

I saw a girl with her family wearing a t-shirt with a quote “Red FM 93.5 Bajate raho” right on her breasts. I kept staring and read it again and again unless her family gave me an angry look. Perhaps, they thought me wrong. I was not doing what they were thinking. Cheap mentality is a great problem on this planet. Even, I suffered from this many times.

Sometimes, I thought why girls wear such t-shirts. Is it like they have been gifted by their boyfriends or they really want to get the attention or it is completely accidental.  I have added the accidental part because I really respect girls.

With this thought, I remember few more vulgar quotes that I have read on girls t-shirts .

“o o coming soon”  on a child girl. I really thought what a nice was of marketing her assets. Perhaps, Mallika sherawat was her ideal. Her mother also seemed to be inspired from Rakhi sawant.

“Real stuff”. I read this in the Eden Garden. She was walking with hand to hand with her boyfriend. Her boyfriend was really a hunk guy with 6ft height.  I resisted from reading again.

“Got Milk.” Girl with this t-shirt was really very fat and the quote suits her much.

“Did you really look here, only for reading this?” It was long quote and I really struggled to read this. We were walking across each other. I had moved my head to peep what is the exact statement. When I crossed her, she was staring at me in a way like she wants to kill me.

PS: Please change your mentality and don’t  make the boys victim of your cheap mentality. 

Courtesy: Google images

Controversial Ads/Ambush Marketing

Case 1 : Coke Vs Pepsico

Case 2: Heinz Vs GSK(ComplanVs Horlicks)

Case 3: HUL Vs P&G(Rin Vs Tide)

Case 4: Jet Vs UB Vs GoAir

Case 5: HUL Vs P&G (Sunsilk Vs Pantene)

Never mix the quotes

“The well bred contradict other people. The wise contradict themselves.” Oscar wilde

Every day , we come across different quotations on facebook, our favorites blogs, office Notice board and so many other places. We think about them for a moment, feel good and forget them the next moment.

But from last few days, I stuck with a question, Isn’t these quotes are contradictory sometimes?

Consider these  quotes:

‘Small Aim is a crime’. APJ kalam

Nobody got anywhere in the world by simply being content. Louis L'Amour

‘An Honest man is who does not expect more than he deserves.’ Ayn Rand

‘One can’t be happy without satisfaction’ Frederick ( I read it on the Company’s notice board, didn’t remember exact words but more or less, it sound like this)

If we look them closely, one of the quote is saying that we should always aim for the highest and the other one is saying, we can’t be happy unless satisfied. Yes, we can be satisfied with what we are and can dream for the highest but then another quote says , we should expect in sync with our abilities and capabilities. How can we sure of our abilities unless we achieved our dream and at the same time, we cannot achieve unless we dream something. And, how can we dream keeping our capabilities in mind when we are not sure .I am also confused now .

Let me give 1 more example, consider the below quotes:

The strength of a family, like the strength of an army, is in its loyalty to each other. Mario puzo

 “Living with a conscience is like driving with the brakes on.” Budd Schulberg

 “I did what my conscience told me to do, and you can't fail if you do that.” Anita Hill

Last quote is saying we must live according to our consciences. Middle one is saying, it is impossible to live with conscience , everybody is flawed or flawless cannot survive. And the first one by Mario puzo stresses on the Loyalty. What if your conscience is tarnishing your loyalty towards family. Isn’t it confusing?

Perhaps, life is a biggest tradeoff and every quote is suitable for different circumstances and situations. And we reap what we want actually at that time to comfort ourselves.

 So, let us not mix these quotes.